The world is with you, not against you.

Have you ever seen this happen? You line up quietly outside the glass doors of a subway (no, not the franchise Subway) waiting for the train to arrive. I say quietly because this is little Singapore; where most people are perhaps so tired after a whole day at work that they have no energy to either smile or chat with the person next to them. Some of course, would rather be entertained by their electronic device. Live , and let live. Of course there are strange people like me who look around, and smile at unsuspecting fellow commuters.

Anyway the train arrives, people walk in and those able to find a seat, do. The beeping starts, warning commuters that the trains doors are about to close. Suddenly someone comes rushing through just as the doors start to close. The expression on the person who just made it through the doors is one of relief of course- that he or she did not get jammed between the doors! Perhaps theres a little pride mixed in at their athletic ability.

I was was watching one such person. Actually it was not the person who had just made it that I was watching; I was watching the rest of the people in the compartment. Maybe it was just me, but it seemed as if everyone was holding their breath. Most conversation had ceased around that particular entrance. Once again it could have just been me, but I was hoping that somehow the person would make it.

I'd like to think that I'm not too different from other human beings in wanting to see someone succeed. I think there is a desire in each one of us- unless we're either clinically depressed or in a comatose state- that we want to see someone make it. To reach their goal. To reach the pinnacle of their career. To be all that they can be. It doesn't matter who the person is- all that binds us to one another is a common bond of empathy and understanding. And most of the time, that is more than enough, to show that we care.

Esther @ www.soakupinfo.com/Esther

The elusiveness of happiness

Is happiness something really worth pursuing? And how does one go about defining happiness anyway? I sincerely doubt that we would be able find a more abstract noun. What is the difference; or is there even a difference between general happiness of the world at large, and that of personal happiness? Or does one lead to the other?

So many questions and so few answers! It's been said that one of the marks of a successful person is his or her ability to ask the right questions, addressed to the right or relevant authority on that subject. So who could we ask that we would deem to be an authority on the subject of happiness?

The answer, i believe lies in our childhood. The time when we were babies and had not a care in the world, except that of seeking out our next meal, and nap time. Babies and toddlers have no conception of fear- they depend on the parent or a significant other to be with them constantly. To monitor them, and of course for survival basics. They truly exist in the now- something which many of us strive to do and few actually do. Perhaps that's what happiness is.

Learning how to live in the now- to make the most of our present moment. To really be present where we are- with all of our faculties. And not just to be present, but to enjoy and make the most of each moment. To learn from the tougher moments, and to move from moment to moment with lightness in our hearts. Maybe love and happiness are synonymous; or at least exist side by side.

Yes I think happiness should be pursued- it may bring greater self-awareness and love for both our self and for others. It may even bring us to Maslow's point of self-actualization. If you're not happy, take some time for self-reflection and find out why. When you seek with all your heart, you will find.

Esther @ www.soakupinfo.com/Esther

Is love as risky as its made out to be?

One of my essay topics when I was in high school was the question," Is it better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all?" For those of us who may be wondering where this oft-quoted phrase originated from, it was stolen from Lord Temnyson's poem, 'In Memoriam:27, 1850. I

"I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all."

I haven't had the good fortune of meeting Lord Temnyson, so I can't give you the exact reasons behind his writing such wonderfully sorrowful and yet pleasurable words words as the ones above. What we can tell is that perhaps he did once love someone so much that even when that person passed from his life- either through death or other means- he never regretted it. For those of us who may have had a similar experience, I'm sure we can agree with this heartfelt expression. I honestly can't say I've had a similar experience; I only pray that the person I love will also feel the same, and that I may never have to express Lord Tennyson's sentiment!

I think it's safe to say that we can extend this statement to more than just romantic love; it could also be the love of a parent for a child, or the love of a family member. It's strange how when we read of statements expressing love, our mind seems to assume romantic love. Or it could just be my foolish, sentimental mind!

I honestly can't remember what I wrote in my essay; the only thing I remember was that I for some inexplicable reason chose this question among others. I'm sure at that tender age my only real experience with love would have been that of parental love, or 'puppy' love, with the latest crush. It's amusing to think of it in hindsight. And why is hindsight always perfect? It's almost unfair! If only hindsight and foresight could trade places, the world would be a far nicer place!

Just out of curiosity, what do you, my reader feel? Is it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Esther @ www.soakupinfo.com/Esther

What is truth?

I remember playing word association games during the course of my study in psychology. In fact I still play them every now and then! For some inexplicable reason the word 'truth' has been popping up in my head. What ideas, thoughts, or associations come to your mind when you think of the word 'truth'?

I can only speak for myself of course. There are two ideas that come to my mind; one is the word trust, and the other is the story of Pontius Pilate in the Bible. Also the phrase that many of us hear and sometimes even quote."the truth shall set you free".

Looking back in history the word 'truth' is taken from an Old English word 'treowth' which meant faithful. If we like, we can further trace back this word to the word 'faith' itself. Which would mean that truth and faith are synonymous. I'll leave you to make your own conclusions though. On my part I think trust comes to mind because of the simple logic that we can only trust someone who tells us the truth. Which raises a secondary question of how do we know when someone is telling us the truth? After all Hollywood, Bollywood and so many other successful movie industries base their paycheck on people who act- or to put it another way- people who portray non-truths and who do it so convincingly that we pay them for it! Of course I'm putting this very simplistically, since I'll be the first to admit that I like a good movie!

However this is a day and age when trust has become a highly priced commodity- it goes to the highest paying bidder. Or to the person who can market it in the most appealing way. How do we know whom and what to believe? I like the idea that many eastern and even some western religions propose; that truth can only be found by searching within ourselves. We each of us needs to find a truth inside us that we can hold onto- while the world around us is shifting and changing. It could be faith in an unseen source, it could be faith in ourselves and our strengths- it doesn't matter as long as it is something that we can hold onto- our anchor.

The story of Pontius Pilate is the story of a man searching for truth or 'the' truth. Be was faced with the decision of punishing Jesus, and he was caught between the guilt of punishing an innocent man, or just going with the crowd and doing whatever they suggested. A dilemma many of us face- especially those of us who choose to step out of our respective comfort zones. He asked the now famous question." What is truth?" He made his decision on his own idea of truth.

Which is what each of us must also do, or are already doing. Truth to one person may not be the same as truth to the person beside him/her. What does matter is how intensely we believe in what we choose to believe and hold on to.

Esther @ www.soakupinfo.com/Esther

What do trees and our memory have in common?

What do trees represent to you? For most, and certainly for me trees represent growth, expansion, life, networking, productivity, relationships, and last but certainly not least- consistency. If you ask a child to draw a tree, they would perhaps draw a picture of a tree trunk with leaves coming out from the top. Some children, perhaps the older ones may draw roots growing into the ground. Or some such similar representation.

What strikes me the most is that the tree is such a universal symbol of life and growth. I'm sure every language on earth has a word that conveys the image of a tree. It may not be the same image that each of us has in our mind, but I'm sure it would be similar. In some cultures and religions trees are even worshipped as they are believed to house tree spirits. In Christianity and Judaism, there is the story of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Trees represent the cycle of life- from birth to growth to decay, and hen to resurrection.

So what do trees have to do with memory, and more pertinently, increasing your memory? Trees represent networks, and our mind works by way of association. So for example if we want to remember a certain idea, we can break it down into smaller ideas and sub-ideas that are related to the main idea. We can create a mental tree that links related ideas together. We can add in images and pictures to those ideas to remember them better. Our mind can easily trace the visual pathway, and connect ideas together for either present or future use.

The relationship between our understanding of an idea and the idea itself is very important. When I mentioned the word 'tree' what was the first thought that popped into your head ? Just as the more time we spend with a certain person or people, the stronger our relationship with that person or those people becomes. The stronger our relationship to a certain idea, the more likely we will be to remember that idea. How we link ideas is specific to our background and the way we view the world at large. No two people think the same way, not even twins!

A tree is a powerful image, and when used wisely can be a great tool to further not just our memory, but also our imagination.

p.s Please also click on:
www.soakupinfo.com/Esther
To learn how to further improve your memory!

What are you selling?

Selling. For most the word conjures up images of salesmen trying to force you to buy something you really don't want or need. Not too long ago I too would have put myself in the category of people who either didn't like selling or considered themselves incapable of selling. I would have much preferred to spell a word than sell a word!

Seriously though, why does the very word strike fear into the hearts of so many, and sheer joy into the hearts of a blessed few? Why are so many terrorized by thoughts of having to sell something?

Especially when the irony is that EVERYONE is selling something, it's just that a minority are actually getting paid for it! What do people sell? Everything! From politics to religion to friendship to love to sex- you name it and its already been sold!

The funnier truth is that many of us would rather sell for free than get paid for doing it. Think about the last time you told someone to try a new restaurant, a new boutique, a new hardware appliance? It doesn't really matter what the product is, the only thing that matters is that we liked it, we were greatly benefitted by it- enough to tell someone else about it.

And that's really at the heart of true selling. It's purpose is not to put a hole in your pocket or a tear in your purse lining for a nonsense product. True salespeople sense a need in their customers and seek to provide a solution. The master salespeople create a need where there may not have been one before. And really it isn't as hard as it seems. And yes it can be learned if one is willing.

Remember the last time you told a friend to try a new café? What motivated you to do that? And then imagine how you felt when your friend did try it and liked it as much as you did? How did you feel? Happy? Satisfied? And what if your friend didn't like it? Did it stop you from sharing your information with other friends? Most likely not.

The truth is we all sell, regardless of the product, regardless of whether we get paid for it or not. The danger is when we become greedy, or when we sell something that we ourselves don't value or don't believe in. But make no mistake-
we all sell. The only question remaining is- what are you selling today?



p.s. Yes I'm selling too!
p.p.s Please click on www.soakupinfo.com/Esther to find out more.

Why following your passion is vital for optimum health.

Many years ago (I'm so tempted to say just a few years ago!), when I was just a wee lass studying in school, I was asked an interesting question by my literature teacher. Not just me of course, but my whole class. And yes I am still a wee lass, not too much has changed in the height department, however much has changed in almost all other departments!

Back to the question; we were asked what the difference was between the three words- surviving, existing, and living? It seemed just a case of semantics, perhaps each word could be use in different contexts. As I was explaining to one of my students the other day; we can derive the meaning of a word when we consider its context. Otherwise we would have to spend most of our waking hours learning new words! At that time I was just focused on analyzing the words for the purpose of the lesson. Not as a metaphor for life itself.

The fact that I still remember that question and the three words shows that I'm now looking at new contexts in which to explore the words. Are we just existing? Plodding along from day to day without a real reason or purpose for living? Or are we just surviving? Barely making it through from day to day? And this does not just imply financially; it could mean physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and in every area of our lives. Or are we really and truly living? Discovering and living out our purpose for being on his planet? I'm sure none of us believes we were accidents; even if we may profess and behave like it sometimes.

It may take some to discover what it is we are passionate about. Like myself for example. if you had asked me even as late as last year what my passion was, I would not have been able to answer. And honestly I was embarrassed. I just knew that from a very young age I wanted to help people. The only thing that remained was how. Now I would be able to tell you that I love writing, reading, meeting people from different cultures.

So its ok to take a little longer, because as long as we keep discovering what we are passionate about, we find out who we really are too. When we keep searching, we will find what we're looking for. The journey inwards can be one of the hardest ones to make, and yet the most rewarding. And when we find ourselves that's when we really, and truly start to live.